Saturday, December 29, 2012

Missing

It's been over 2 months since my doctor sent me home to rest.  The graft I had this summer isn't healing.(I had a spinal fusion with bone marrow graft and hardware) So for over 2 months I've stayed home. Most of my day is spent in bed reading, taking naps, and watching movies. I know that this has been hard on my students. It's been tough to find a certified teacher to take over too. I miss my students just as if they were truly my family. I guess they really are in some way. Most of them were with me last year and again the first part of this school year. It broke my heart to leave them to someone else. Although I know they were in good hands with a wonderful teacher, it was like turning a stranger loose in my home to care for my own children. I cried, I threw fits, I cried some more. Finally, I am beginning to see the light at the end of an otherwise dark tunnel.

I know I will be able to return to my school family. I've prayed, my students even put me on their prayer list, my family and friends are praying. I believe that God put the love to teach in me when I was too young to even go to school. When I was barely old enough to attend Sunday school, I wanted to be a teacher. I love what I do. I feel it is an honor to be paid (poorly but I am paid) to do something I love so much. It's like a gnawing inside of me that gets stronger every day. Seldom are there days that I don't want to teach, sometimes my urge to be there gets a little vague, but it doesn't take much to bring it back to full force. God gave me the drive and desire to teach. I truly believe that. I do it because I love it, not because it's my job. So for now I'll continue my healing and know that soon I will be back with my school family.

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